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דבר חופשי : דיבורים על הא ודא

eCOWnomics

קראתי את זה בפוסטר בחנות בתל אביב ופשוט הייתי חייב לפרסם !באמת כדאי לקרוא עד הסוף,מצחיק ביותר A RUSSIAN CORPORATION ...
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קישור חוזר הגדרות אשכול אפשרויות הצגת נושא
ישן 01-02-10, 19:51   #1 (קישור ישיר)
IO Pro
 
סמל האישי של TrueLook
 
תאריך הצטרפות: Jul 2008
הודעות: 1,003
ברירת מחדל eCOWnomics

קראתי את זה בפוסטר בחנות בתל אביב ופשוט הייתי חייב לפרסם
!באמת כדאי לקרוא עד הסוף,מצחיק ביותר






A RUSSIAN CORPORATION
You have two cows.
You count them and learn you have five cows.
You count them again and learn you have 42 cows.
You count them again and learn you have 12 cows.
You stop counting cows and open another bottle of vodka.
-------

COMMUNISM:
You have 2 cows.
The State takes both and gives you some milk.
-------

FASCISM:
You have 2 cows.
The State takes both and sells you some milk.
-------

NAZISM:
You have 2 cows.
The State takes both and shoots you.
-------

TRADITIONAL CAPITALISM:
You have two cows.
You sell one and buy a bull.
Your herd multiplies, and the economy grows.
You sell them and retire on the income.
-------

AN AMERICAN CORPORATION:
You have two cows.
You sell one, and force the other to produce the milk of four cows.
You are surprised when the cow drops dead.
-------

A FRENCH CORPORATION:
You have two cows.
You go on strike because you want three cows.
-------

AN AUSTRALIAN CORPORATION:
You have 2 cows, News limited buys them for an inflated price.
They eat clover for months and produce nothing.
Rupert gets pissed at another one of his children.
-------

A JAPANESE CORPORATION:
You have two cows.
You redesign them so they are one-tenth the size of an ordinary cow and
produce twenty times the milk.
You then create clever cow cartoon images called Cowkimon and market them
World-Wide.
-------

A GERMAN CORPORATION:
You have two cows.
You reengineer them so they live for 100 years, eat once a month, and
milk
themselves.
-------

A BRITISH CORPORATION:
You have two cows. Both are mad.
-------

AN ITALIAN CORPORATION:
You have two cows, but you don't know where they are.
You break for lunch.
-------

A SWISS CORPORATION:
You have 5000 cows, none of which belong to you.
You charge others for storing them.
-------

A HINDU CORPORATION:
You have two cows.
You worship them.
-------

A CHINESE CORPORATION:
You have two cows.
You have 300 people milking them.
You claim full employment, high bovine productivity, and arrest the
newsman
who reported the numbers.
-------

AN ISRAELI CORPORATION:
So, there are these two Jewish cows, right? They open a milk factory, an
ice cream store, and then sell the movie rights. They send their calves to
Harvard to become doctors. So, who needs people?
-------

A NEW ZEALAND CORPORATION:
You have 2 cows.
The one on the left looks very attractive
-------

SOCIALISM:
You have 2 cows.
You give one to your neighbour.
-------

SURREALISM:
You have two giraffes.
The government requires you to take harmonica lessons.
-------

A WELSH CORPORATION:
You have two cows.
The one on the left looks very attractive.
-------

AN INDIAN CORPORATION:
You have two cows.
You worship them.
-------

BUREAUCRATISM CORPORATION:
You have 2 cows.
The State takes both, shoots one, milks the other, and then throws the milk away…
-------

AN IRAQI CORPORATION:
Everyone thinks you have lots of cows.
You tell them that you have none.
No-one believes you, so they bomb you and invade your country.
You still have no cows, but at least now you are part of Democracy….
-------

ENRON CAPITALISM:
You have two cows.
You sell three of them to your publicly listed company,
using letters of
credit opened by your brother-in-law at the bank,
then execute a debt/equity swap with an associated general offer so that you get all four
cows back, with a tax exemption for five cows.
The milk rights of the six cows are transferred via an intermediary to a
Cayman Island
company secretly owned by the majority shareholder who sells
the rights to all seven cows back to your listed company.
The annual report says the company owns eight cows, with an option on one
more.
Sell one cow to buy a new president of the United States, leaving you
with
nine cows. No balance sheet provided with the release.
The public buys your bull.
-------
__________________
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TrueLook לא מחובר   הגב עם ציטוט
ישן 01-02-10, 20:58   #2 (קישור ישיר)
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תאריך הצטרפות: Sep 2008
הודעות: 658
שלח הודעה דרך MSN אל Quntix
ברירת מחדל

AN IRAQI CORPORATION:
Everyone thinks you have lots of cows.
You tell them that you have none.
No-one believes you, so they bomb you and invade your country.
You still have no cows, but at least now you are part of Democracy….

חחחחחח היסטרי
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Quntix לא מחובר   הגב עם ציטוט
ישן 01-02-10, 22:06   #3 (קישור ישיר)
Rig Master
 
סמל האישי של Juiced
 
תאריך הצטרפות: Jul 2008
הודעות: 7,926
ברירת מחדל

ממש אהבתי את היפני , Cowkimon !!
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